Talk 20 – Cold Love

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If I am fine it is because you were my editor.
No, love was your editor. I could have done a better job at making you happy.
You were perfect.
Says my ex-wife at my deathbed. Haha.
You taught me to not take life too seriously. To bloom where I am planted. Not to fall into patterns that were meant for others.
You have bloomed and will make somebody very happy.
Stop saying that. We see it, it’s in front of us, that’s enough. Please do not say it again. I know gypsies are more comfortable with death. You accept it and can drink and laugh at a wake. But not me.
I will not say it again.
I am sorry, I think that is why we separated. I could never adopt your ways. I understand them and respect them but in moments of weakness I judged them.
That is not a fault. I should have met you half way. But let’s not speak of the past with regret.
It was beautiful.
Yes, I have no regrets.
You shouldn’t have. You are prefect.
Aha, my stones on my head.
Second smile in ten minutes. I am doing well. Soon I will get you in bed.
Like you haven’t had me so many times.
Remember the park in mid winter?
We were so drunk.
We were so in love that we didn’t feel the cold.
My ass was on the snow.
How many people can say they have made love right on the snow?
I can.
Yes you can!
The beach, the train, the car in the middle of nowhere. We tried everything. But with time we grew conservative.
It is the natural flow of things. Brandy gives way to wine, wine to tea. That is the life of the wise man.
See you are the wiser.
But I still drink brandy sometimes.
We should have kids.
We should, jump under the sheets. Haha.
Haha. I am sorry I didn’t save enough to buy you a home.
Don’t be sorry. You took me around the world. I would have never dared to take six weeks at at time off work and visit eight countries on three continents. I would have never dared to start painting. You sold my first paintings and that gave me courage. You helped me believe in myself. That is bigger than any brick house.
The tangible world is also important, I understand that now. I don’t regret my ignorance now that I am wiser.
Without the tangible the intangible cannot exist.
It is a fine balance.
And we did a good job finding it.
Yes, we pulled in the opposite direction. Haha. You wanted security, I wanted to travel.
Argument leads to the truth.
You are my truth.
I love you.
I always have. Hm. Can you give me a sip of water with that cup?
Here. You’re burning. Your stomach must be burning.
I am fine, just a hangover. Need to sleep it off and tomorrow we will go for truffles.
You need to rest.
I sleep like a baby. I am fine.
Don’t think about me. Smiles, not tears. Here, here. Have some brandy, you deserve it. Sister! Sister, brandy!
You shouldn’t drink, brother.
Not me, for her. Brandy for everyone! Don’t be shy. Tell my brothers I am buying.
She could use some.
I am fine.
Drink love, drink for him.
Thank you.
How is it? Does it warm your throat and your mind? You take a step back from your usual perspective, things slow down. You see things clearly now. Life is easy. It is a song well played, a spoonful of honey. What a beauty! Hm.
Breathe! Relax. Breathe.
What a beauty.
Don’t come in here!
Relax love, he likes the smoke. Reminds him of his youth sneaking cigarettes in the woods. Come, you must be hungry.
I don’t want to leave him.
Go my love, I will rest my eyes for a while.
Yes, he must rest. Talking exhausts him. Come.
I’m not hungry.
I cooked your favorite.
Mushroom-baked rice.
You remember!
Of course.
Then I will have a little.
Let’s smoke a cigarette first.

next chapter: TALK 21 – Apples

previous chapter: TALK 19 – STILL LIFE

all chapters: TALK


photograph by Justin LaBerge


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